42 - Super Useful Things We Bought After Our Husbands Died

Christina and Meghan think back to those early days of loss and share the things they bought to make life a little easier without their husbands. It's worth spending a few bucks on Amazon to get a jar opener!

Links from this episode:
Chicken Feeders - https://amzn.to/3Ae3FC8
RoboTwist - https://amzn.to/3g74BBG
Step ladder - https://amzn.to/3O5PbtQ
Grabber - https://amzn.to/3hJKGZO
Kasa smart plugs - https://amzn.to/3TBilCn
Jar opener multitool - https://amzn.to/3X3fPaT
Dry erase board - https://amzn.to/3X3FVuf

Full Book Cup Club Book of the Month:
Each month we will choose a new book to read together as a community. This month, join us in reading  "The Happiness Advantage: How a Positive Brain Fuels Success in Work and Life" by Shawn Achor. 

Transcript

00;00;00;08 - 00;00;09;16
Christina
I have to wonder if people know that at the end of our podcast, you and I, when we do the toasts, we really do raise our glasses.

00;00;09;24 - 00;00;11;06
Meghan
Yeah, well, our cans.

00;00;11;09 - 00;00;36;09
Christina
Our cans, our cans, sparkling whatever. But we definitely like since we've done that from the very beginning. We raise our glasses. So I hope that if you're listening and you are that you sit down with your favorite beverage when you're listening to the podcast and that you raise your glass at the end of the podcast and make a toast with us.

00;00;36;15 - 00;00;42;08
Meghan
Yeah, I hope so too, because we really do do it. Promise? Pinky swear. Hi, I'm Megan.

00;00;42;09 - 00;00;46;01
Christina
And I am Christina. And this is a full cup club podcast.

00;00;46;14 - 00;00;55;22
Meghan
We're here to talk through the good, the bad and the ugly of loss. Whether that's losing a loved one, a job, a dream, or even your marbles.

00;00;56;14 - 00;01;26;22
Christina
So whether your cup has coffee, tea or vodka in it. Welcome to the Full Cup Club, Friends. On today's episode, we're going to talk about purchases we made after the loss of our spouse. And that might sound yeah, but they were helpful and so we wanted to share those with you today. But before we begin, as always, we want to talk about what is in our cup, what's filling our cup, what is in our cup and hope right there.

00;01;26;23 - 00;01;50;01
Christina
Megan is opening a can, clearly. And then also what is filling our cup metaphorically in our lives right now and which is very important. It's what we were so is so important to us on the podcast that people are finding things to fill their cup in the season of life that can be very hard. So, Megan. Yes? What is in your cup today?

00;01;50;16 - 00;01;58;28
Meghan
Okay. Literally in the can. I just opened its Waterloo cranberry flavored sparkling water. Oh, I.

00;01;58;28 - 00;02;00;23
Christina
Hope it's good. I hope it's good fingers.

00;02;00;28 - 00;02;06;11
Meghan
Oh, that's good, too. And I've never had it. I don't have high hopes. It's good. Oh, my goodness.

00;02;06;11 - 00;02;07;16
Christina
I'm excited.

00;02;07;16 - 00;02;09;14
Meghan
Yeah, it's good. I recommend this.

00;02;09;14 - 00;02;10;11
Christina
Quick. Okay.

00;02;10;16 - 00;02;32;26
Meghan
So much better than the I think I have like a cranberry lime, some other brand. Not too long ago I think it was good and gather because it's still in my fridge because I didn't like it. This one is so much better. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, ten out of ten. Well, seven out of ten. It's good, but it's not the best one I've ever had.

00;02;33;03 - 00;02;58;22
Meghan
But I recommend it filling my cup metaphorically. Let me think a moment because I feel like this week in particular has just been a very busy week in my life. So it's I have had trouble stopping to smell the roses, you know what I mean? Because I just have thing after another, you know, just like got to be here, got to do this, you know?

00;02;58;26 - 00;03;21;18
Meghan
And and we all have times like that, and I'm in one right now, so I'm just like, have to remind myself to be present and to just take a deep breath. And, you know, this is a temporary, busy feeling. It's not it's not forever. I am not jumping back into the very stressful, overworked life that I have once had.

00;03;22;22 - 00;03;31;25
Meghan
But what is filling my cup? I got this giant bag of popcorn from Costco.

00;03;31;25 - 00;03;33;19
Christina
I love it. I love it.

00;03;34;17 - 00;03;56;15
Meghan
It's kettle corn and it's in the purple bag. I think the brand is boom chain o me, but I'm so blessed. It's that one. I have a little baggie of it every single day because I put it in my lunch and I just look forward to it. That is good.

00;03;56;26 - 00;04;01;15
Christina
That is good stuff. Yeah.

00;04;01;15 - 00;04;04;12
Meghan
So what's filling your cup currently?

00;04;04;12 - 00;04;25;22
Christina
What is in my cup is water. Nothing fancy. Just nice cold water, metaphorically. What's filling my cup is I was thinking about this when you were saying that because yeah, we jumped in and I didn't give it a lot of thought. But really I'm struggling right now because I'm coming off of a month long trip and I also had COVID and I'm struggling.

00;04;25;28 - 00;04;55;01
Christina
And this is just reminding me it's a good reminder for me as I'm going through some other changes in my life that that's how like it's like I'm going through change. So the hormonal changes and just some shifting of things in my life and I'm I'm really struggling with not, you know, jumping right back into the how things were and the rhythm of my life before and keeping my house clean and all of those things.

00;04;55;08 - 00;05;10;21
Christina
And so really right now, it's just like giving myself grace and reminding myself, like, as the seasons change, you're tired. Like all of the things are shifting. I am still on East Coast time. I'm waking up like.

00;05;10;21 - 00;05;11;02
Meghan
Yeah.

00;05;11;09 - 00;05;34;06
Christina
Hours before the sun comes up. And so I think I'm just giving myself grace right now. It's been the thing that's been helpful this week, and it's hard because I'm like, I just want to like jump back in, like, what's wrong with me? And it's like, Hey, you were sick, you traveled, you did all of these things. And so if that's you right now, if you're struggling, you're not alone.

00;05;34;06 - 00;05;47;07
Christina
Like, and I think cause, like, life just keeps teaching me, like, hey, like, you got to be gentle with yourself. You have to give yourself grace. So that is. That's what what's happening? Filling my cup right now.

00;05;47;13 - 00;05;56;28
Meghan
Yeah, that's good. That's. That's good. And probably something that you weren't able to do with yourself before. So it's like good growth also.

00;05;56;28 - 00;06;13;28
Christina
Yeah. Yeah, I'm proud of myself. So friends on today's episode, we are talking about purchases that we made after our spouse died and so we're going to jump right in. What were some of those things for you?

00;06;13;28 - 00;06;26;25
Meghan
Well, okay, I want to flip it back on you. Tell me what the first thing you bought that you remember, you know, it doesn't have to be like the very first thing in your purchase history on Amazon.

00;06;26;25 - 00;06;41;15
Christina
I am. I'm going back to my purchase history as you're sitting right here on the podcast because I mean, I know it's going to be a lot of stuff that I purchased for the service, but I do want to see because yeah, pretty quickly.

00;06;41;15 - 00;06;44;25
Meghan
That's not the stuff I'm talking about. It's like the stuff that.

00;06;44;25 - 00;06;46;24
Christina
The fun stuff, what's not the fun stuff?

00;06;46;29 - 00;06;59;07
Meghan
Fun or like made your life better or brought you joy. What is your first like either frivolous or very useful in your new life purchase that you made?

00;06;59;14 - 00;07;25;25
Christina
The first thing that I bought was called, I know it's silly, but it's called Grandpa's Theater and it is an automatic chicken theater. So Michael had chickens. We had chickens. And I was having to go out like three times a day and feed these chickens. I was feeding them by hand and I don't even know where I came up with the idea of looking for this, but I could sell these feeders and I bought two of them.

00;07;25;25 - 00;07;45;17
Christina
And that way I didn't have to be here. My in-laws could help with coming over and like making sure they were okay, but these feeders held like two weeks worth of food so I could put a month's supply of food. And I was laughing. So it was just a mental weight off of me that I wasn't having to feed the chickens.

00;07;45;17 - 00;07;47;25
Christina
So yeah, the chicken feeders.

00;07;48;04 - 00;08;15;17
Meghan
Yeah, that makes total sense. The very first thing that I bought after Jason died and you know, I'm not including things for the celebration of life or anything like that. The first thing that was like useful that I was like, I need this with my whole soul is zip tie cable markers that I could label all of the tables and connected through the.

00;08;15;17 - 00;08;16;06
Christina
TV.

00;08;16;06 - 00;08;38;07
Meghan
And the and the receiver and the Roku and the whatever, you know, because it was such a jumbled mess that I couldn't make heads or tails and I am I'm pretty tech savvy, you know, I'm not I'm not completely oblivious when it comes to that sort of stuff. But I was like, Why does this plug go here? That doesn't make sense, you know?

00;08;38;07 - 00;08;50;03
Meghan
And I was so annoyed with it that I was like, I've got to organize this. And it was like a week after Jason died. I mean, it was pretty great. That was the first I could not.

00;08;52;09 - 00;08;58;19
Christina
Know, decided, like, here, I'm over here with chicken food and you're like, I'm going to be yeah, I've.

00;08;58;19 - 00;09;03;26
Meghan
Got to organize the most obscure part of my house that nobody will ever see.

00;09;04;05 - 00;09;05;05
Christina
That's funny.

00;09;06;16 - 00;09;10;04
Meghan
Yeah. And then also, I stocked up on batteries for my vibrator.

00;09;10;24 - 00;09;20;09
Christina
There you go. The important things in life, just being real hair people.

00;09;22;03 - 00;09;26;04
Meghan
So what's one of the most useful things that you bought after Michael died?

00;09;26;12 - 00;09;58;22
Christina
I bought a couple of things for the kitchen and my hands. I mean, that's like when you lose your person and they're the person who opened the pickle jars or they're the tall person and they reach stuff on, those are pretty fast things that you realize like, Oh, and you're like, How am I going to do this? And so because my hand, my right hand has some damage from the work I did years ago, I bought a robo twist.

00;09;58;22 - 00;10;17;07
Christina
I've evolved, probably seen those on the infomercials that I bought, that thing that like goes around your pickle jar and it pops the lid open. That was one thing. Yeah. Then I also bought this really handy gadget and we can link these and the bios so that people can actually see them and they may want to purchase them.

00;10;17;07 - 00;10;38;10
Christina
It wasn't they weren't super expensive, but it was like a grip thing that I could and it looks like a tool, but it's got all of these little like, you know, you can pop a can of soda open with one piece of it. There's all kinds of little cool things that you can use it for. So that was another one.

00;10;38;10 - 00;10;49;09
Christina
And then the grabber like it's a tool, you know, that grabs stuff off the top shelf. And I found that to be very helpful.

00;10;49;09 - 00;10;57;13
Meghan
I remember when I hurt my back, you sent me one of those because I couldn't bend them. I couldn't, like, get things off the floor.

00;10;58;00 - 00;11;20;07
Christina
They're handy, man. Yeah. Yeah. Like, okay, so I'm, you know, 45 when this happened. 40? Well, yeah, I was 45 when he died. And I'm like, okay, I know older people probably would be buying these, but I'm like, This is genius. Like, I can reach things and I don't have to drag a ladder out. And which is another thing that I bought with a stepladder.

00;11;20;12 - 00;11;30;04
Meghan
Mm. Yeah, I have, I bought a stepladder for every room of my house so that I didn't have to move my step ladder around.

00;11;30;15 - 00;11;45;19
Christina
That is smart because I mean, honestly, I don't have a big house. You have like upstairs, downstairs at your house. So that totally yeah. Sense. But yes I also do hate that I'm like I don't walk all the way in there and get. Yeah. So it makes sense, right. Yeah.

00;11;45;23 - 00;11;49;23
Meghan
So yeah there's one and it will there in every room where there's like something.

00;11;49;23 - 00;11;50;23
Christina
Called range.

00;11;50;23 - 00;11;56;06
Meghan
Right now. So yeah that was something I also bought that can twisty thing.

00;11;56;07 - 00;11;56;22
Christina
Oh okay.

00;11;56;22 - 00;12;23;00
Meghan
The little jar opener thing. Yeah. I got one of those too. And then something that I realized pretty quickly that I wanted was to feel safe. And I felt, you know, living by myself in this house while not by myself being the sole adult and protecting and caring for a young kid, I was like, this has to be this has to feel safe.

00;12;23;00 - 00;12;45;17
Meghan
We have to have some safety here. So I got a home security system. And also I this was like one of the first projects I did. I had to replace all of the fixtures on my outdoor lighting so that they all worked properly. So I do like buying new fixtures and and wire them or whatever. And so then that way my house is really well lit.

00;12;46;05 - 00;13;08;10
Meghan
So every time we go outside at night it's lit, we come home to a lit up house. I have lights just everywhere so that there's no like nooks and crannies or, or creepy spots, you know? And because I really wanted to feel safe and that was a way I thought that I could do it is make the house really well lit and get cameras for me.

00;13;08;10 - 00;13;30;23
Christina
I did that, but it was my dad saying like, I want you to get a security system. So I got a security system. And it wasn't until later on like more recently that I invested in cameras because the cameras that came with the previous security system, which is still in place, didn't do what I wanted them to do.

00;13;31;04 - 00;13;52;25
Christina
And so now, but I think like it was, they're reasonably priced. I use the ring like the ring doorbells and the ring cameras and stuff like that. And so it wasn't like astronomical. You know, I was able to do that myself, which I watched. It's empowering to be able to do that. It was simple enough I couldn't wire them.

00;13;52;25 - 00;14;15;28
Christina
And so because my house has siding on it and they cited over my front door. So I had to get I found they have a battery pack. So just like how you charge your cell phone, I charge the battery packs on these cameras and then recently found out there are brackets that you can put your cameras onto your siding.

00;14;16;06 - 00;14;38;21
Christina
And so I think that if you're looking for stuff, do your research and you can find this stuff and you don't have to actually have a security company come out. You can do this yourself and I think gives me a lot of peace of mind. The thing that was shocking to me is that one day I got a notification that there were somebody on my house and I looked and I would never have known it before.

00;14;38;29 - 00;14;57;14
Christina
And the person walked down my driveway and down the side of my house, and I was able to see that it was somebody that their dog, it was a woman. And her dog had, like, wandered down there. Yeah, but it's just it's peace of mind. And so if you're listening and you're like, hey, I haven't thought of that.

00;14;57;24 - 00;15;20;12
Christina
There are very reasonably priced security things out there. And if nothing else, I would encourage you to do like some sort of a doorbell situation. Yeah. You know what? I don't you know, whatever company it is that way you're not answering your front door. You can answer through that doorbell, you can see what's going on. And they give you a quite a bit of visibility.

00;15;20;12 - 00;15;21;05
Christina
So that is.

00;15;21;09 - 00;15;44;25
Meghan
Yeah. And it's just it's peace of mind to I think, you know, something that I bought and this one, it's not that it's silly. It's that I bought an air fryer. Okay. After Jason died and it's not like I wouldn't have bought that while he was alive. But the significance of buying that after he died was like, I wanted it.

00;15;44;29 - 00;16;00;12
Meghan
I wanted it. I didn't have to, like, talk about it with somebody. Oh, you know. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I have to, like, make the decision with somebody else. I was like, no, this was a thing. I want to try it. I remember the first thing I made with it too. Because you buy an air fryer because it's like, better for you, right?

00;16;00;15 - 00;16;14;12
Meghan
Supposed to be like less oil. It's the first thing I made was hand pies crushing it so healthy.

00;16;15;03 - 00;16;32;29
Christina
It's funny that you say air fryer because as I was walking through my house when I was making notes of like what were the things that I opened? And I saw the air fryer and my thought was, this is definitely something we would have purchased. But I don't think the air fryers I was even aware of an air fryer when he was alive.

00;16;33;10 - 00;16;36;08
Christina
When did they come out? Because he died in.

00;16;36;10 - 00;16;37;17
Meghan
One 2018.

00;16;37;18 - 00;16;38;07
Christina
Did you?

00;16;38;07 - 00;16;39;03
Meghan
Oh, okay.

00;16;39;08 - 00;16;43;00
Christina
See, I was very late to the game. I didn't get mine until 2020.

00;16;43;01 - 00;17;02;14
Meghan
Well, and I wasn't like, you know, out waiting to buy one or anything. Like, I just, you know what I mean? It's not like it was in my cart forever before I bought it, and it probably would have been something we eventually bought. But the significance of of something like that to me was just not having to make that decision with somebody else.

00;17;02;16 - 00;17;20;06
Meghan
It was like I wasn't going to get it. You know, I like these chairs, so I'm going to buy these chairs. I have run it by somebody. Yeah. You know, and so that's it's almost a perk a little bit, you know, it's not like you're excited about your person dying, but it's like, well, you know, here's a here's a bit of a silver lining.

00;17;20;11 - 00;17;20;22
Meghan
You know.

00;17;21;06 - 00;17;40;21
Christina
For me, the big purchases, the things that I did like redoing my kitchen floor, those were things that it was like I made that decision. And like you're saying, you didn't have to consult somebody else. And so those were kind of milestone things to go through after after losing him. You mentioned something I want to go back to.

00;17;40;21 - 00;17;54;26
Christina
You talked about lights in your house. And I've mentioned this before, but it's been a while on the podcast is that you can buy plug ins, that you can plug lamps into. There's so many different options out there now for how you can you're talking.

00;17;54;26 - 00;17;56;01
Meghan
About smart switches.

00;17;56;01 - 00;17;57;10
Christina
Smart switches. Thank you.

00;17;57;10 - 00;17;58;14
Meghan
And smart plugs.

00;17;58;14 - 00;18;23;05
Christina
Yes, I use casa. There are, you know, outside stuff. Amazon has stuff. But I really want to encourage you if you are someone who is now living alone, you have experience last year now living alone, especially like you're thinking about fall. People are coming home in the dark or they're leaving work, they're leaving home in the dark. And what these do is you can set them.

00;18;23;05 - 00;18;42;13
Christina
I love that there's an app on my phone. I just had to plug into it. They connected and what happens is that I have it set for like certain times to come on in the morning and to come on at night. And I love that. And I just I helped somebody who lost their spouse, set that up in their home.

00;18;42;13 - 00;18;43;14
Christina
So I love it.

00;18;43;14 - 00;19;02;01
Meghan
I am such a fan of the smart plug and the smart switches. I have had them for a long time and I just didn't even think to talk about it on this episode because I'm just I bought a smart switch for that purpose. A smart plug for that purpose when when I was between husbands before I even mentioned.

00;19;02;06 - 00;19;02;14
Christina
Okay.

00;19;02;16 - 00;19;18;27
Meghan
I was living on my own with my son, who was little at the time. And I did not like coming home to a dark house, you know. So I had a smart plug that would turn on this lamp that would light up so that I didn't have to come home to a dark house. And I just felt a lot more safe that way.

00;19;18;27 - 00;19;42;08
Meghan
So yeah, I am such a fan. Casa is a great brand. I really like that one. Also, Wemo, I've, I have some of those, I have switches and plugs for both of those. So you, if you feel confident with your with your skills, with your electrical skills, you can replace a light switch with a smart switch. And if you don't feel confident, just call an electrician.

00;19;42;08 - 00;19;57;21
Meghan
It is not that expensive for them to do it. Just like buy the switch and they'll replace it for you. And it is not that expensive. When I had a bunch to do, I had an electrician do it because it was like he was going to finish it so much faster than I would, you know, it's just worth it.

00;19;57;21 - 00;20;13;29
Meghan
But yes, I am such a huge fan of those switches that you can put on timers. I have one that I use as an alarm, so my and I have my morning alarm, right that goes off like on my phone. But then also a light turns on and it's like gently wake you.

00;20;13;29 - 00;20;37;03
Christina
Yes, that is my favorite. And I have the same thing. The other thing that I love that for is if if it is your spouse that you have lost, it's kind of sad. Well, let's be honest. Like it's very sad to walk into your bedroom at night. And especially like if your room is dark. And I love that minus set to come on when the sun goes down.

00;20;37;10 - 00;20;57;04
Christina
That's pardon that's one thing in the app. And so I also know oh the sun just went down, but it also adds that nice ambiance in my bedroom and it's more peaceful. So you're not just like walking in in the dark and yeah, especially if you need to walk across your bedroom, maybe to turn a lamp on or something like that, right?

00;20;57;05 - 00;20;58;23
Christina
That was something that I liked about it.

00;20;58;23 - 00;21;09;29
Meghan
Yeah, that's a really good point. Telling you the most frivolous, silly thing that you bought, that you were just like, I want this and I don't even have a good reason. I'm just going to buy it.

00;21;09;29 - 00;21;15;06
Christina
I don't even know. Like I bought so many things that just spark joy in my life.

00;21;15;06 - 00;21;30;19
Meghan
So tell me. Okay, okay. Let me rephrase the question. Tell me something that you bought that you literally only bought because you loved it. You just wanted it. There was a real, you know, purpose. It's just something you you just wanted.

00;21;30;20 - 00;21;47;00
Christina
Oh, I think, like, maybe my peloton bike was something that I really wanted and that yeah, maybe a lot of people would find frivolous. There is a lot of different like, I don't know, I had other exercise equipment, but I really want it and it was something I was already working towards.

00;21;47;06 - 00;21;52;10
Meghan
I remember when you got it, you were so excited. I remember, yeah, I got it. It was.

00;21;52;10 - 00;21;52;24
Christina
A great.

00;21;52;24 - 00;21;53;21
Meghan
Investment.

00;21;53;28 - 00;21;56;06
Christina
So what about you? What was something that you bought?

00;21;56;18 - 00;22;25;10
Meghan
Okay, so something very silly that I bought and I haven't even used it. I bought. I was ordering some shoes from Zappos dot com and I needed some running shoes. I got those and I got a couple of pairs of like standard like heels or wedges or something. And then I bought this pair of like sparkly, beautiful Badgley Mischka heels.

00;22;26;03 - 00;22;43;24
Meghan
They look like princess shoes, they look like Cinderella's lost glass slipper, like they look they are beautiful fully. Do not fit into my life. Where am I going to wear these shoes?

00;22;43;24 - 00;22;46;13
Christina
Like you're really okay?

00;22;47;21 - 00;23;09;12
Meghan
But I bought them because I was like, these are beautiful. And they're just like sitting on my on a shelf in my closet. I can see them, they're out. They sparked and I see them like they sparked joy. I mean, at this point, I'm like, that was silly. Those are silly, but they're beautiful. So whatever, it's art. They were and they were not cheap either, you know.

00;23;09;27 - 00;23;19;17
Meghan
So to spend that amount of money on something that I just didn't even use, it's silly. It was just that was a silly purchase.

00;23;19;17 - 00;23;39;16
Christina
Yeah, that's awesome. So we talked about things that made our life easier and we talked about like, maybe things that were bigger purchases like floors what? And we talked about things that brought us joy. Is there anything else that you can think of that you purchased that you would recommend for people.

00;23;40;13 - 00;24;05;22
Meghan
You know, if you don't already have a dry erase board? I already had one and I used it for a lot of things. I used it to make To-Do lists at the very beginning. I used it to write down things that I accomplished and things I was proud of. I use it to, you know, going forward to plan future goals or to write notes to myself.

00;24;05;22 - 00;24;20;09
Meghan
So like, it was just such a handy tool to have if you don't just already have a dry erase board somewhere that you see every day, like your kitchen or your bedroom, whatever, wherever it is, I suggest getting a dry erase board. What about.

00;24;20;09 - 00;24;47;01
Christina
You? I don't have a dry erase board, but I use post-it. I bought so many Post-its and all different colors and I love using them to write down quotes and stuff like that to encourage myself just different things or lessons that I need to learn, quotes that really had a meaning behind them and reminded me, you know, sometimes they just said, breathe, you know, you know, take a deep breath in and relax your shoulders, those types of things.

00;24;47;01 - 00;24;50;08
Christina
So yeah, I like that. Similar of just.

00;24;50;11 - 00;24;50;20
Meghan
Yeah.

00;24;50;23 - 00;24;52;28
Christina
Be able to make notes and write things down.

00;24;52;28 - 00;25;16;17
Meghan
So yeah, that was yeah, that was really helpful for me in the beginning. And then also I'm, I really like organization. I'm just a person who gets stressed out by clutter and mess and things like that. So anything that I could buy like, you know, those zip ties to organize all of the cables behind my TV, I bought like draw organizers for like the junk drawer in my kitchen.

00;25;16;20 - 00;25;36;05
Meghan
You know, little things like that just helped me feel better because I don't like mess and clutter. So think about what that is for you. Maybe you're fine living in clutter. Maybe that's okay. But maybe there's something else that really triggers you. What can you buy? It doesn't have to be expensive. Exactly. Maybe it's something from the dollar store.

00;25;36;05 - 00;25;41;03
Meghan
Yeah, you know. Exactly. But what can you buy to, like, alleviate that stress or solve that problem?

00;25;41;04 - 00;26;05;21
Christina
Exactly. I love it. Solving problems because that is when you run into something. I, I love the idea. I live my life by this. How can I like how can I open that jar? How can I do this? Because it's a lot of this can fall on you. If it was a spouse that you lost, maybe it's a parent that you lost and you're going through it organizing their home.

00;26;06;01 - 00;26;28;20
Christina
And it's like, what is the tool that I can buy that can solve this problem and make this a little easier? Is that a label or is it is it a set of sharpies that are different colors that you label boxes? Yeah. Is it maybe that you have the resources that you can hire a company to come in and organize all of the stuff?

00;26;28;20 - 00;26;39;00
Meghan
Or is it buying, you know, tubs or plastic bins from the dollar store to do it yourself? You know, it doesn't have to be this like, oh, well, I can't afford organized.

00;26;39;01 - 00;27;03;28
Christina
Exactly, exactly, exactly. And there are there are like and I'll just throw this out there because I was not aware of this. So like maybe if it is a parent that you lost, there are companies that will come in and I believe they do it for a percentage. But like if you are to have an estate seller or something like that so that it's not costing you to have this, and they'll come in and help organize all of your stuff and label and do all of that.

00;27;03;28 - 00;27;19;05
Christina
So something to consider. But yeah, it's like when you're doing this, you're processing, you're having, you're processing grief and what are the things that could take some of those things off of the table for you? Right. The stress and give you back some bandwidth in the process.

00;27;19;05 - 00;27;46;14
Meghan
Yeah. Think about how much your time is worth if you're earning in an hourly income, what's it going to cost to solve the problem? Maybe you spend $10 or maybe you spend $50, but you save 2 hours of your time because now you've got something that will handle that. And or maybe you just save a lot of stress because you're looking at this pile of stuff is stressing you out like that money as well spent.

00;27;46;17 - 00;28;10;12
Christina
Mm hmm. Yes, it is. I, I agree. I think of the chicken coop example that I gave in the beginning, and it's like that was tying me to my home. Like I. Yeah, that meant that if somebody was going to come over and help feed my animals, they were going to need to come several times a day. And so if I invested in this feeder, then that that took that off of their plate.

00;28;10;12 - 00;28;30;25
Christina
They just wouldn't have to come and feed, you know, take care of, you know, feed the dog or take the dog or whatever that look like. And so you have gone through a lot and I just would encourage you, you know, if somebody says, what is it? You know, or maybe you're friends of somebody who has just lost someone.

00;28;30;25 - 00;28;50;28
Christina
Those are very practical gifts, you know, jar openers, ladders, those type of things, a grab or whatever. Yeah. And you can just say like, here's a grabber, like for when I, you know, you need to get something off of a shelf. I mean, if somebody had given me that, I would have been like, this is genius.

00;28;50;28 - 00;28;52;01
Meghan
So yeah.

00;28;52;08 - 00;28;52;24
Christina
You know.

00;28;52;28 - 00;28;56;04
Meghan
You see anyone? And I was like, this is so useful. Yeah.

00;28;56;04 - 00;29;01;03
Christina
Thank you. Yeah. Like the the robot twist or anything like that. Or a cost.

00;29;01;07 - 00;29;09;10
Meghan
Like a set of tools. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Like if it's a if it's a person who, you know, is unfamiliar with tools, just like a basic one.

00;29;09;10 - 00;29;28;02
Christina
Yes, exactly. Yeah. I mean, for me, Michael's tools were all of they were not organized and it's taken me a while. So having those basic things that I think that's another great gift idea. I mean, we're not talking about gift ideas, but if you're listening to take note for these types of things.

00;29;28;02 - 00;29;32;23
Meghan
Okay, do you have anything else to add to this episode or to the topic?

00;29;32;23 - 00;30;08;18
Christina
Give yourself permission to spend the money to make your life easier. If that, like Megan said, if it's $5, if it's $10, if you have the resources to buy back your time doing that, if you're yeah. If you're able to. But if it's something where this is a first time, maybe you are making the financial decisions, these are really good investment and give yourself permission to do that, whether it be lawn care or like Megan said, somebody's coming in and doing the electrical and switching out your stuff.

00;30;08;18 - 00;30;11;13
Christina
Give yourself permission to do those things.

00;30;12;11 - 00;30;13;12
Meghan
To hire that out.

00;30;13;12 - 00;30;14;01
Christina
Yes.

00;30;14;05 - 00;30;15;04
Meghan
If you have the resources.

00;30;15;04 - 00;30;45;21
Christina
Yes. If you have the resources and you may just have somebody who is offering to do that. And we've said this, you know, previously, if you have if you struggle with asking for help, make that a goal to, you know, courageously ask for help and graciously accept help there a lot of times are people right after you lose your your spouse or partner or someone in your life that they offer and you can say, hey, do you know how to do this?

00;30;45;21 - 00;30;49;13
Christina
And maybe that's something in their wheelhouse. So yeah.

00;30;49;21 - 00;31;19;20
Meghan
Yeah. Okay, friends, while the time has come, so whether your cup is empty, half full or overflowing, raise it up. Here's to the craziness of life after loss. Cheers. Thank you so much for being here with us. Please subscribe to our podcast if you found it helpful and you can also find us on social media on Instagram at Four Cup Club podcast, and if you search Full Club Club podcast on Facebook again, thanks friends and we'll see you next time.